Doubt

Don't doubt in the dark, what God has revealed in the light.

Doubt. I hate that word. When trials come up in life, and things don't go as planned, the devil puts seeds of doubt in my mind. I'm reminded of Thomas, one of Jesus' disciples, who doubted the appearance of Jesus to the other disciples. He wanted PROOF that Jesus really had been there. He said, "Except I shall see in His hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into His side, I will not believe." The Bible doesn't really give us why he had unbelief in his heart, but I could imagine that he was feeling despondent after the crucifixion of Christ. Things didn't go quite the way he thought they would.

I've often wondered why Thomas doubted--and even judged him in a sense. But, I've come to realize that I do the same thing. When things happen, I feel like I need proof--some visible affirmation of what I know to be true; I want signs from God showing me explicitly what is going to happen next and how this trial is going to play out.  In my head, I know I need to just trust God; He is in control and there is no reason to doubt Him. But my heart often strays to feelings, and then there is war between the heart and mind.

The quote at the top of this post is true: Don't doubt in the dark, what God has revealed in the light. Does it matter how many trials come my {our} way? Are trials reason to doubt? No, God is good all the time, no matter the circumstances.
Another quote that one of my friends shared with me was: When it all boils down to it, there's only black and white. Women {and probably men too} tend to want gray areas, but you cannot rely on feelings. Stick to what you know God said; not what you feel at the time of trials.

God is in control, and when I rest in the thought, I find my doubts gone.